Two Teachers - Two Approaches to Confidence: What do you think?
“Carly has clearly outperformed the other children in her spelling performance and she should be recognised for both her hard work and her achievement. Recognition will build her confidence and spur her on to keep working hard.”
“Carly won the Spelling Bee by a mile and knows it. She has had all the recognition she needs. The next child in line should also be recognised so Carly doesn’t get puffed up and John feels a sense of accomplishment too.”
This is not just a school-based attitude, it happens all the time in workplaces, too. I have heard managers use these same two arguments with respect to their teams, especially when it comes to sales personnel.
BUT… There’s a problem with both of these approaches. They place you at the mercy of the kind of manager you have, and their philosophy of recognition and praise.
That’s why my goal is to instill the kind of elemental confidence that is fueled every day by your own actions and responses and is not dependent on anyone else. Because even if people are not deliberately unkind, they’re busy – and often they just don’t stop to think about what kind of boost your confidence might need.