… but you can change that.
Most people let others off the hook because they want to be seen as a nice person and because we are conditioned to believe that calling people out is neither nice nor kind.
That is absolutely wrong!
Letting people get away with unreliability is one the cruellest thing you can do to anyone of any age because it teaches them to lie to themselves and break promises to themselves.
“Nice” is one of those words people use when they can’t think of anything positive to say, but don’t want to offend someone.
Maybe the following acronym will make you think twice next time you are considering giving someone an easy way out:-
- tell you you’re behaving badly and hurting or offending others
- make sure you realise the consequences of your action (or inaction)
- enable you to move forward and achieve your goals
- set standards and hold you to them
“NICE” is really a polite way of saying, “I don’t care about you or your life.”
Is that really the person you want to be? Do you really care so little about your family, friends, colleagues, and clients?
…Or have you been brainwashed into thinking that calling someone out is kind, when it’s really killing you, your friends and family.
N.B. I’m not suggesting that you’re nasty to people, but lovingly honest, especially about their excuses.
It’s true, calling people (including yourself) out when they fail to:
- Arrive on time (or at all)
- Deliver on their promises
- Give notice of changes
- Complete projects
- Take care of themselves
…is not particularly comfortable.
However, accepting those excuses and giving a non-committal response won’t help anyone make the changes they need to make to go the places they want to go.