Fortunately (or unfortunately) what you encounter in other people is often what you are yourself.
At Life Puzzle through our Training and Coaching Programs, we meet a lot of people. The people we meet have relationships at work, friendships, relationships with family members and so on. Some of the people in their lives make them happy, others had behaviours that bothered them and some of them even recognize we that often attract people in our lives to learn from them.
It was interesting as a few years ago I met a lady who had a team of people in her business that she claimed were constantly ‘taking advantage of her’ and her constant complaint was that there was ‘no good staff or good people out there’. The problem was that the behaviours that she was complaining about were the exact types of behaviours that she was unconsciously exhibiting in other areas of her life.
Although it was a challenging conversation to have with her (and she resisted that she could possibly be doing these behaviours initially) she came to realise that in fact she was. Now this wasn’t a situation for situation exchange, here’s a couple of examples:
- Broken Agreements: She was upset about her staff being late despite their agreements to be on time. In her personal life she was late for her family all the time.
- Accountability: She complained that they would constantly miss their targets then blame the economy, the customers or her. In her friendships she would promise to do something for a friend and then get mad at the friend for expecting her to do it when she already had so much to do.
When she came to the realization that these annoyances where things that she was unconsciously doing herself she changed her approach to her staff and (her words) “it was like magically a new team of the same people appeared over a few weeks”.
Life is a series of encounters. The more people you meet and observe, the better we understand ourselves. The more we understand ourselves the better our chances of healing and understanding others.
Perception is projection is a universal belief system under Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). In Life Puzzle, we use it in Business and Life Coaching.
To see ourselves fully and the things that are holding us back from becoming the person we want most to be, request a FREE Deep Dive Discovery Session and meet Chandell. It only takes a single step. Contact firstname.lastname@example.org now.