“Either you own your work, your time, and your results, or you delegate ownership to other people. When you take ownership, you become resourceful because success or failure are in your own hands.”

~ Chandell Labbozzetta

Your Actions Tell the Story

If you wanted to predict the long term success of an employee, colleague, family member… or even yourself, you might be surprised to learn that there’s an easy way to do it.

Find out if they’re reactive or resourceful.

Resourceful people are generally happier, more productive, and more likely to achieve their goals than those who spend their days reacting to people, news, and circumstances.

Let’s start by defining our terms:

A reactive person:

  • Keeps an eye on their email or message system to discover what they need to work on each day;
  • Is easily interruptible and highly distracted because they make other people’s problems their priorities;
  • Often fails to complete their tasks and meet deadlines causing problems for colleagues;
  • Has a long list of excuses (or reasons) why things didn’t work out.

A resourceful person:

  • Starts each day with a plan (often formulated the night before) – which might involve troubleshooting an issue or responding to someone else;
  • Focuses on the most important things and responds to emergencies appropriately and decisively because they have clarity;
  • Meets deadlines consistently and makes their colleagues lives’ easier;
  • Takes responsibility for failures and mistakes and makes a plan to avoid future occurrences;
  • Celebrates successes.

Which group did you fall into?

Attitude Underlies Action

Your actions show your resourcefulness. Your attitudes determine your resourcefulness.

IF you believe…

  • That other people should pay the price for your mistakes
  • That you should follow instructions blindly even when there is no urgency about the situation
  • That it’s not your place to make suggestions or point out potential pitfalls
  • That you should wait for direction and not proactively look for tasks that need to be completed…

THEN… you will always have a long list of reasons why things do or do not work out.

That may shield you comfortably from any blame, but it will also erode your self-esteem and make long-term success unlikely. It may be a sliding scale, rather than a binary choice, but most people are consistent through all areas of their life.

Reactivity and the Erosion of Self-Esteem

When Adrian came to see me, he was worried about all the work that needed to get finished so that he could support his family and spend more time with them. He felt as though he was struggling to perform at work and at home and every day he felt more of a failure. It was clear that he was so busy reacting to the world around him that he felt totally unresourceful and it was also clear that his diminishing self-respect was going to catch up with him even though he presented a confident and decisive face to the world.

As we talked about what was going on at work, it was clear that Adrian was showing up each day and checking email to decide what his first task would be. By the time he got around to the tasks that would create momentum (when he was able to do so) it was already late in the day, time was short and his energy was at a low level. He knew that he was not making the contribution he wanted to and day by day his self-esteem was slipping away. Toward the end of our first session, he finally shared the incident that was the tipping point for him – the evidence that he needed outside help:

“You know the old joke about ‘the dog ate my homework’? I’ve found myself tempted to make excuses and blame other people whenever there’s a stuff-up.

Once upon a time (not very long ago), my attitude was, ‘If I worked on it, then I own it.’ Now I’ve slipped into the habit of ‘shared work, shared responsibility’. The problem with that is that if no-one honestly owns the work, then you can’t fix it.

I don’t want to be that person because:

1. It really does affect the way I see myself and flow over into all my relationships; and

2. I get mad when I hear other people shifting blame.”

Can you help me go back to where I used to be?

Adrian’s Intervention

I was impressed by Adrian’s openness and self-awareness.

He had seen the erosion of his self-esteem and decided to ask for help because, although he had identified his unwanted behaviour correctly, he wasn’t sure about the cure. In addition, he was worried because the behaviours he hated in himself were evident in those around him as well: blame shifting, making excuses, wasted effort…

I shared with Adrian a simple, yet powerful technique that I teach in my coaching and online programs that helped him become more resourceful… And the results were fast and fantastic!

Within a month his:

  • Depression vanished;
  • Interest and engagement with his wife and kids was renewed – along with an increased awareness of their respect for him;
  • Productivity skyrocketed;
  • Sense of self-esteem, purpose and clarity increased;
  • Work offered him a promotion and pay rise.

And do you know what… When his inner landscape changed, so did his income and;

Internal Accountability

All the talk of the Pandemic and the many ways that governments have intervened to overturn previously autonomous businesses has eroded people’s sense of resourcefulness and personal power at an alarming rate. I’m concerned about the impact on businesses and even more concerned about the effect on people’s mental and emotional health that is evident in the way people are responding to challenges.

At the end of the day, the only person whom you can really be accountable for is yourself. Internal accountability is hard work, which is why most people turn to coaches and mentors for external accountability. The problem is that sometimes a coach or mentor will take your excuses and the stories you tell yourself on board because they don’t want to be the bad guy. That’s why my programs provide accountability, but are designed to help you become your own accountability partner: aware, determined, and resourceful rather than dependent on an external source.

Next week we’re going to talk about how you can change those unresourceful attitudes and actions so that you can create the success you want, and build your self-esteem quickly, without expensive therapy.

Discover what’s next – https://lifepuzzle.com.au/3-steps-to-becoming-resourceful/

“Do not let yourself be a slave to chance, but let your dauntless mind shape the triumphant future you choose.”

~ Chandell Labbozzetta (paraphrase of William Shakespeare)

You: A Walled Fortress

In one of her essays, Simone Weil, Jewish-French philosopher and holocaust survivor reflects on the role of walls in our lives. When I read her thought-provoking reflection, I was reminded of many clients I’ve worked with over the years. Some used walls as an excuse to hide, others used them to communicate, still others smashed the walls wide open.

This is a paraphrase of Weil’s thoughts applied to people I know and clients I’ve worked with – including the ones who choose NOT to CHANGE.

When you are shut up in a row of cells, there is a wall that separates you from the prisoner in the next cell. Sometimes prisoners develop codes for communicating with other prisoners, creating a sense of community in their suffering, Sometimes ,prisoners are able to tunnel under the walls and communicate secretly, but more extensively. Sometimes, a miracle happens, the walls disintegrate, sunlight enters, and the prisoner is freed.

When that happens, the question is: how will the prisoner respond to freedom?

My goal (and the purpose for which I built LifePuzzle) isn’t to ‘influence’ people.

It’s to create change!

I’ve seen too many people who had all the resources, gifts, talents, and time they needed, choose to stay inside the walls of their self-confessed prison to think that ‘influence’ will be enough.

The Cost of Security and Self-Protection

For a prisoner, a wall can be frustrating as it stops them from building relationships and achieving their dreams.

So… Maybe you have built walls around you like a fortress, for protection from your fears. Unfortunately, the walls that shut others out, also shut you inside and stop you from achieving your dreams – or even setting your feet on the path toward them.

I’m not suggesting that you ignore precautions and recklessly go out in search of danger. Fear is an appropriate response to danger. The challenge lies in learning to trust yourself enough to distinguish between the fear that tells you to run from danger, and that which you need to over face and conquer.

The Call of Freedom

The history-makers of this world – those dauntless men and women who refused to be tamed by fear, bullied into silence or suppression of their gifts are the ones who are free. Free to serve others, free to share with others, and free to change and grow.

There is a price to be paid for that tantalising prospect of freedom. That price is CHANGE.

Do YOU want to be free?

Like anything else that is worthwhile, the price is high.

I train people to speak in public as well as providing sales training. In the context of developing both of those skills, I frequently share the statistic that over 70% of the population fear public speaking more than they fear death.

It’s an interesting contrast… because both of those dreaded outcomes involved a willingness to change, to grow, and to face the unknown. Neither of them ignore the reality of fear, but they both involve applying dauntless courage to that fear and moving forward in the face of it.

That is the cost of freedom.

Dauntless: Overcoming Fear

What is stopping you, from being, doing, and having everything you want?

It’s usually fear. That might be fear of:

  • failure,
  • others’ mockery or criticism,
  • yourself,
  • hunger, misery, poverty…

BUT… Imagine what YOU could accomplish if you were dauntless – experiencing fear, but not letting it tame you.

  1. What goals would you set?
  2. What risks would you take?
  3. What tasks would you accomplish?
  4. What would change?

And finally…

What is stopping you from being that person and doing those things?

All it takes is a willingness to step out and be yourself with dauntless determination.

“Momentum is what makes an avalanche so dangerous, a galloping horse so unstoppable, and social movements so powerful.”

~ Chandell Labbozzetta

Your Three Minds… the Key to Your Success and Achievement

In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) we illustrate the concept of your three minds with three intersecting circles shown below:

The3minds 768x744

The 3 Minds

As shown these three minds are the critical faculty, the conscious mind, and the unconscious mind and at the intersection of these is our true self which grows and develops in accordance with our decisions to trust and honour ourselves (which leads to growth) or to distrust ourselves (which leads to diminishment).

Any time you successfully harness the power of all three minds in your efforts, you create a degree of momentum that virtually ensures successful completion. So, the question becomes…

How does each of these three minds contribute to my success, and what steps do I need to take to shift from striving to achieving?

Your Conscious Mind: Goals, Plans and Actions

Setting goals has to do with vision and it’s helpful if your goals have a sense of inevitability. An avalanche heads downhill, following the line of least resistance until its momentum is exhausted. A galloping horse runs for the horizon until it can run no further. A social movement grows in noise and power until it achieves its object. In the same way, your goals, plans, and actions provide you with a destination and a path to follow.

The biggest reason why people don’t make progress toward their goals is that they lack a clear picture of their destination and path.

This leaves their conscious mind without direction and makes them easy to distract.

Your Unconscious Mind: Motivation and Emotional Connection

Have you noticed how much harder you are to distract when you are intent on getting an answer or achieving something you really care about?

One of my colleagues is always jumping around and never seems to get anything done when you ask her to submit reports and complete administrative tasks. However, put her in front of a room of c-suite executives to sell her ideas, or ask her to prepare a sales presentation and she is focused, insightful, and 100% engaged.

What’s the difference?

The difference is the emotional connection between her actions, goals, and effort. When she is preparing a presentation or delivering a sales pitch she is totally invested in engaging the audience and delivering a result. Admin is just a chore.

With her permission, we decided to run a test and create an emotional motivational connection between submitting those reports (which are tied to her presentations and sales results). The difference was phenomenal!

Your Critical Faculty: Formed and Filtered by You!

Psychologists tell us that until the age of seven our minds uncritically accept whatever ideas they are fed. After that we develop the ability to filter ideas and decide what to accept and what to reject. However, we are still dependent on the outside world to present ideas to us.

You’ve probably heard people talk about the echo-chamber effect – which can be exacerbated by AI on the internet. Facebook uses this extensively and it is the reason why you see more of certain people and related ideas and less of others. Every time you respond to a post, you increase the probability that you will see more posts and products along those lines. The problem with living in an echo-chamber is that your critical faculty is being conditioned to only accept certain lines of thinking.

This also presents an exciting opportunity for you to determine where your thinking will take you. The more you present yourself with material that affirms your goals, supports your belief that they are both possible and desirable, and directs your course of action towards them, the more probable (even inevitable) it is that you will achieve them easily and effortlessly.

Your True Self: Integration of Desire and Reality

Fantasies are fun to indulge… But Fairy Tales are even better because they could actually come true.

When you harness the power of your three minds, deliberately set out to design your success and create a path that leads to that success, you are creating your own fairy tale and making yourself deliberately lucky.

You have more control over your future… and even your present… circumstances than you imagine.

What will you make of them?

“Energy flows where attention goes so focus on what you WANT to see realised.”

Angles, Perspective, and Results

One of my hobbies (and teaching techniques) is drawing. When you are drawing something or composing a picture (or a photograph) it’s fascinating to see how what you see and the meaning you attach to it changes when you look at the same subject from different angles or perspectives. When you move close to a glass of wine and look up through the bulb it looks quite different from the way it looks when you back away and set it behind a vase of flowers or something else.

This principle is equally true when it comes to the angle from which you view events, people, and circumstances. A new angle provides new insights, learnings, and opportunities.

Several months ago, I attended a personal development course and we were exploring our attitudes and reactions through a series of games that challenged us to shift our focus. The exercise forced me to look at particular behaviours from a different angle, and that caused my behaviour to change… in an empowering way.

What fascinated me, is that the change was brought about not by focusing on the behaviour itself, but simply by shifting my point of view.

This is just as true in my coaching and sales training courses. Sometimes a person will come in with the ‘been there, done that, teach me something new’ attitude.

I love that! And what gives me even more joy, is at the end of the session or quarter, when they say, “I may not have learned anything that is stunningly new, but the way you helped me see and do things has transformed my outcomes and made selling effortless.”

Deep Cleaning Does Wonders

Most years I run a workshop early in January to help people release the previous year and set themselves up for the new year. One of the most powerful sections of this workshop is the one that uses Time Line Therapy® practices to release the emotions and limiting beliefs that many people picked up over the past 12 months.

This year, that practice was especially transformative given the turmoil of 2020 (global pandemic anyone?) and the uncertainties we still face at the start of 2021.

This makes complete sense when you think about it.

You know how, when you are applying those 3M sticky pads to a surface, or putting a screen protector on your phone, they instruct you to clean the surface thoroughly first?

If you ignore those instructions, things don’t work out so well – the adhesive doesn’t stick as well or else there are annoying bumps and irregularities on the screen that don’t show up until after you’ve applied the protector, but then they are incredibly obvious.

Well, your goals and plans are like that, too. When you acknowledge and clean up the negative emotions and failures, affirm your positive results and progress, and celebrate your wins, it’s like cleaning the surface before applying a new screen protector or placing a sticky pad: you can see more clearly and plan and act more decisively because you have more angles to view from.

How Could this Be Different?

As I’ve been discussing goals, planning, and habit practices with business owners and sales professionals over the years, I’ve noticed a few common approaches that you may recognise:

  • Everything is changing so fast that systems, plans, and habits are only marginally helpful – you really need to do everything on the fly and you’ll be disappointed if you have clear goals;
  • There is so much turmoil and uncertainty around that you need to exert iron control over the only thing you can – your routine and habits must be set in stone and your plans and goals non-negotiable;
  • There are no guarantees about anything, especially in business so I’ll just do what I feel like and hope it works out;
  • I know that what worked before will work again, so I’ll just keep on doing it even if I don’t see the results I’’m used to seeing.

Actually, there’s a place for most of these attitudes in your success – the challenge is to get the right mix and you can only do that if you are able to see from a variety of perspectives.

What’s Stopping You Cold?

Often there is just one thing that is stopping people from achieving their goals. Usually, it’s something that other people can see, but you can’t.

It might be a:

  • Habit
  • Relationship
  • Limiting belief
  • Lack of skill
  • Lack of resources
  • Mistaken focus
  • Distraction of overwhelm

In my experience, it’s usually something that you are completely unaware of, because as soon as you become conscious of this particular thing, it ceases to be a problem.

Nathan couldn’t work out why he kept getting appointments with people, but was never able to close the sale until we worked together while his colleagues were easily able to sell to the same prospects. By the end of the first session, I knew why he couldn’t see the product: every unrehearsed word that came out of his mouth screamed, “This is way overpriced!”

He didn’t have a clue about what he was really communicating until I pointed it out to him. Once he saw that, he was ready to drop his attitude about ‘lousy prospects’, ‘poor sales scripts and tools’, and ‘no money’ and he quickly became the company’s star sales person.

What Will You Do?

You can blame your misfortunes and lack of success on other people.

You can get angry with the WHO, the universe, and your political leaders.

You can grit your teeth and keep doing the same old things.

You can quit.

OR

You can find different ways of seeing, new angles and approaches to old problems, and solutions that really work and make selling effortless.

Sometimes, you need to learn from someone new because your existing teachers have become too familiar. Sometimes you need to make an appointment and sit down with an experienced coach or mentor who will help you see old problems in new ways. Sometimes, sitting with a group of people like you and hearing their problems, perspectives, and solutions are what it takes to get unstuck.

If you’re interested in a new approach my program, Confident Conversion: 90 days to More Cash, More Clients, More Impact, offers 3 different levels of engagement.
Schedule a call to learn which one is best suited to your needs.

“The formula for disaster is: Could + Should + Won’t.”

~ Jim Rohn

… When Life Throws Curve Balls!

Do you like it when everything runs smoothly and you can pat yourself on the back and tell yourself what a great job you did and celebrate your achievement?

I do… But that doesn’t always play out for me.

Frequently, just as I’m gearing up for a challenge something happens that makes me wonder what I should do. I could give you lots of examples (some of them are funny in hindsight) like the time where:

  • My computer crashed just before an important presentation and I had to present without any slides or visuals. I thought about rescheduling, but my colleague told me to go ahead any way and I closed the deal. In fact, the client said that is was my determination and readiness to innovate that was the clincher.

Or when:

  • I was on a plane headed up to Sydney for the day to speak at a conference without a change of clothes and my seat mate spilled her meal tray over me. I was able to hide clean most of it up and borrow a shawl to hide the rest and I learned to always pack something to change into for emergencies.

Or when:

  • My internet cut out part way through a webinar – everything just died and the platform I was using wouldn’t let me restart using the same link so I knew that even if I got back online with my phone I wouldn’t able to restart it in the same room. That was the time that I received a flood of emails telling me how valuable my teaching had been and asking how they could work with me.

Last year threw most of us a number of curve balls… and I’m willing to bet that this year will probably be eventful, too.

Are you prepared for that?

The Formula for Success is…

Could + Should + Will!

In the examples above, something went wrong that I couldn’t control so I asked myself three questions:

  1. How could I approach this situation?
  2. What should I do in response to this situation?
  3. What will I do now to resolve the situation, make things right, or get things moving?

This formula for success, achievement, and happiness is available to everyone. Many people are good at finding answers to the first two questions, but a lot of them stumble when they’re asked if they’re willing to do what it takes next.

Why?

Well, it’s like people’s answer to the question: “Do you want to be rich?” Around 90% of people will say yes, but there is only a small percentage of those who will do what it takes to achieve their desire ethically.

How could I approach this situation?

This is about exploring options and it is deliberately a ‘how’ question.

There is rarely only one way to solve a problem, so as you consider this question be prepared for objections and energetic discussion. In fact, if you can only find one viable solution then you are almost certainly kidding yourself.

If you have the opportunity to discuss your situation with other people, you should be looking for several possibilities and taking as much time as you need to pick holes and find advantages of each different path.

Whether you’re thinking about business problem or a personal one, it’s wise to remember that if you can only think of one solution, then you need to ask others for help because when you broaden your thinking you increase the chance of finding a solution that you are willing to implement. Many Victorians faced this last year during the lockdown – most came up with innovative solutions with potential to kept them afloat.

What should I do in response to this situation?

This is the time to come up with your preferred approach and to think about your strategy… the steps and actions you’ll take, people to talk to, and so on.

Your goal here is plan a ‘best approach’ that will take you from your current position to your desired goal. You don’t want to over-complicate your approach, but neither do you want to over-simplify things to the point where you can’t actually arrive at your destination, or to the point where you create massive headaches for your colleagues.

Once you get to this stage, you really need to commit to a single approach – you will get in trouble if you keep zigging and zagging around. Of course, if new information comes to light and you realise that you need to change course that is one thing, but that is all the more reason to consider a variety of possibilities at the start.

What will I do now to resolve the situation, make things right, or get things moving?

This is the step that divides failure from success.

You thought about your options.

You chose your path and developed a plan.

Now it’s time to execute: will you? Or won’t you?

There’s a catchy saying: “If you fail to plan, you’re planning to fail.” It has a certain amount of truth in it, but and even more potent saying would be: “If you fail to act, then failure is certain!” It doesn’t have quite the same ring to it, but it is 100% true.

Plans without action aren’t worth anything at all and decisive action simply doesn’t happen unless you choose to say, “Yes, I will execute this plan.”

Are You Ready to Create Your Own Success?

If I asked you whether you had the support and information you need to make this year incredible no matter what curve balls are thrown, would your response be, “ABSOLUTELY!”

If not, I’d like to invite you to make this the year you stick your neck out and ‘go for gold’?

If you’d like some help on the business side of things, you may be interested in my new online Confident Conversion program. Discover the details here

“It’s easier to turn a moving ship, but if you’re heading for an iceberg that may be the wrong response.”

~ Chandell Labbozzetta

Don’t ‘Just Do It’!

Speculation about the sinking of the Titanic in 1912 is unending. One recent documentary hypothesized that if the helmsman had not turned the ship, but had hit the iceberg head on the ship would not have sunk.

I don’t claim to be an expert on that particular strategy, but I do have personal experience coaching people who have taken a firm stand on Nike’s ‘Just do it!’ slogan and then sought my help to get them out of the personal or business mess they’ve ended up in.

My advice to you is: Think and plan before you take any action!

Here’s why…

Before You  Deepen the Rut Any Further...

Habitual actions are like well worn pathways for the brain. It’s usually easier to walk along a pathway than over untracked wastelands where you can trip and fall so before you start a new course it’s important to ask some questions like:

  • Will this take me where I want to go?
  • What are the unintended consequences of this course of action?
  • Is there a better way?

This is not the same as analysis paralysis, it’s simply setting aside some time to examine your strategy and roadmap before you set out on a course you may regret.

You probably know someone who habitually reaches for M&Ms or other sugary treats to beat the 3pm energy slump and stay productive… And maybe that person has a weight problem as result of that habit. Many smokers gain weight because they swapped the habit of smoking for the habit of snacking or nicotine for drugs – partly because they didn’t think far enough down the track.

Even if you are starting a positive habit or stopping a negative one, it’s worth asking yourself the questions above so that you can strategically develop your plan for substitution.

An equally important question is:

  • What is stopping me (or has previously stopped me) from doing this?

If you’ve ever tried or watched sports like acrobatic snowboarding or BMX, you’ll know that heading for an obstacle can be dangerous – the faster you are going and the more momentum there is driving you, the greater the risk of a nasty accident.

This is just as true with personal and business growth as it is in sports.

That’s why it’s important to…

Review the Past

Look back at your previous attempts to change or grow in this area and see what you encountered.

In my business and sales coaching, I’ve noticed that people who don’t take a look at their results and outcomes over the past quarter and year before they plan the next one, frequently keep making the same mistakes.

The same is true when it comes to reaching personal goals like exercise, flexibility, weight, career development, skills improvement and so on… When you look back and determine what derailed your efforts in the past, you can often find different strategies or ways to remove the barriers, so you don’t hit them at speed next time.

Every quarter, Alison set herself a sales goal and every quarter she failed to meet that goal. As a result, she was disappointed in her performance and embarrassed when she had to say to her manager, “My goal was $x and I only managed to close $y.” As a result, she was constantly beating herself up mentally and emotionally. When Alison and I sat down to talk about what was going on, it was immediately clear that she never asked herself the critical questions about why this kept happening, she just kept right on following the ‘Just do it!’ method.

We were able to identify the barriers that had derailed her performance and discover ways to remove or work around them, but that wouldn’t have happened without our review.

Review the Past

Look back at your previous attempts to change or grow in this area and see what you encountered.

In my business and sales coaching, I’ve noticed that people who don’t take a look at their results and outcomes over the past quarter and year before they plan the next one, frequently keep making the same mistakes.

The same is true when it comes to reaching personal goals like exercise, flexibility, weight, career development, skills improvement and so on… When you look back and determine what derailed your efforts in the past, you can often find different strategies or ways to remove the barriers, so you don’t hit them at speed next time.

Every quarter, Alison set herself a sales goal and every quarter she failed to meet that goal. As a result, she was disappointed in her performance and embarrassed when she had to say to her manager, “My goal was $x and I only managed to close $y.” As a result, she was constantly beating herself up mentally and emotionally. When Alison and I sat down to talk about what was going on, it was immediately clear that she never asked herself the critical questions about why this kept happening, she just kept right on following the ‘Just do it!’ method.

We were able to identify the barriers that had derailed her performance and discover ways to remove or work around them, but that wouldn’t have happened without our review.

Reset and Remove

Every time you do something you create pathways in your brain and muscles that make it easier to follow the same path again. This means that if you want to change your habitual patterns of thought or action it gets harder the longer you’ve been following your current path.

Your mind is like a piece of paper that has been written on and erased so many times that there are little pathways going in every direction. That’s why a reset is so important: it’s like taking a fresh sheet of paper and starting again.

After you’ve done your review and identified what barriers might be in your way I use a variety of NLP, Time Line Therapy®, and other techniques to release emotional, mental, and physical hindrances and barriers so that you can set out on a fresh journey that is less likely to be derailed by your past actions and experiences. I help my clients do this as well and it’s often the difference that makes the difference.

Without this reset and removal process it can be hard to envision a different outcome, let alone plan and sustain your journey to the goal.

Quest for Your Best

Every day I work with people just like you who are sick of mediocrity and are on a quest for their best. I don’t believe that January 1st is a magical date, but I do believe that having time-based intervals for achievement is a proven and powerful tool.

Actually, I break my year up into intervals and I schedule time each day and week for mini-review and reset breaks because that enables me to catch myself up quickly and stay on track. I also include bigger reviews and planning sessions on a quarterly and annual basis to set the direction against which I can measure my progress and make sure that my sights are set on the appropriate target – sometimes targets change based on life-circumstances and opportunities that arise.

If you’d like to experience my Quest for Your Best process in person you can join me for a 4-hour journey in which we…

  • Reflect on where we have come from and what needs to be learned, strengthened, or changed;
  • Revisit our personal wins and integrate them into who we are and who we are becoming;
  • Regroup and Reset by releasing our past failures, disappointments, and disasters and giving ourselves a fresh start;
  • Refocus on our goals and ensure that they are still sufficient for where we are today;
  • Refresh our plan and design the actions and habits that will unerringly take us toward our goal.

I will lead you through my own proven process and share the tools I use including the activities and exercises I use to eliminate friction and give me a fresh canvas that keeps momentum and enthusiasm high.

If that sounds interesting… Go to https://lifepuzzle.com.au/business-development/quest-4-your-best/ 
for more information and to reserve your spot or take advantage of our special Christmas offer.

“If your habits don’t line up with your dream, then you need to either change your habits or change your dream.”

~ John Maxwell

Too Big, Too Small, or Just Right - Why Size Matters.

Recently, I was reflecting on a comment that Brittany Smith, a cognitive scientist with ADHD, made about habits that reinforced something I had already realised.

If your ‘habit chunks’ are too small, you don’t see any change and give up.

If your ‘habit chunks’ are too big, you get overwhelmed and discouraged.

BUT…

If your ‘habit chunks’ are just right… you get results that keep your motivation high and find yourself kicking goals week after week!

I see this frequently with my coaching and training clients:

Right habit chunk size = SUCCESS

Wrong habit chunk size = FAILURE

So, how can you know if you’ve picked the appropriate chunk size for each of your habits?

Signs that Your Habits Chunks are Too Small:

Habit chunks that are too small are usually related to pre-existing habits in any area of our life. We all have habits that drive how we act and react in every area of life and these are so much a part of us that we are hardly even aware of their existence.

The beauty of these tiny habit chunks is that when we decide we want to change something we can simply expand the habit we already have in place no matter what it is.

***

Sandra was extremely frustrated because she was trying to grow her referral program and couldn’t get the traction, she wanted so she started looking around for yet another tool or strategy to help her.

When we looked closely at what she was doing to generate referrals it was clear that she didn’t need to start over, she simply needed to amplify her existing referral strategy with one additional step. Once that was in place, the referrals started to flow.

***

It happens in every area of life:

  • Exercise programs;
  • Diet & nutrition;
  • Learning and retention;
  • Budgeting and saving;
  • Productivity…

If you feel frustrated with the results you are seeing and know that your strategy has worked for other people, then you can often see the transformation you want simply by amplifying the habits surrounding it.

If Your Habits Chunks are Too Big, Then...

…You’ll probably quit before you see results!

Oversized habit chunks are usually part of a new habit that you’re trying to establish to reach an important goal. Many habit-tracking apps will alert you if you consistently miss your goals and suggest that you edit the habit in order to succeed and you should pay attention to these alerts.

***

Al read the book Shorter and decided that he wanted to restructure his workday and test the hypothesis because the idea of accomplishing more important work in 30 hours than he was currently doing in 60 hours appealed to him.

He plugged the habits he wanted to establish in order to accomplish this into his habit tracker and got down to business… only to discover that day after day he was failing to check off half of the components he’d identified.

When we pruned those habits back to a smaller milestone goal and he was accomplishing them all, Al’s sense of accomplishment and confidence grew and he was soon ready to add another chunk to his habit, and then another.

The habit of success motivated him far more than his failures had and now he does have all the components of that original habit chunk in place.

***

When Your Habits Chunks are Just Right, Then…

Like Sandra and Al, you experience success – not just in achieving the outcome, but in the personal satisfaction of accomplishing a goal. This gives you the same kind of dopamine hit that some people get from checking Facebook, the news, or drugs.

Skipping your habit one day isn’t a disaster, but looking at your week and realizing that you’ve skipped more days than you’ve executed creates a negative neuro-feedback loop that actually saps your motivation to stick to your habit. That’s why you want a habit tracking mechanism that allows you skip days that you choose to without giving you a sense of guilt.

Contrary to popular practice, guilt is a terrible motivator. It’s when you feel good about your accomplishments that confidence grows – and with that confidence the ability to achieve even more.

Habit Transformation Challenge

Habits are such an important aspect of building lives and businesses that serve our goals. Habit-creation tools are one of the most powerful aspects of NLP because once established, habits run on auto-pilot and enable us to progress towards our goals faster and with less friction.

At LifePuzzle, we consider habit transformation so important that it is a part of many of our courses and trainings (both paid and free) including:

  • Periodic 5-Day Habit Transformation Challenges
  • NLP Mastery Academy Group program
  • NLP Certification courses
  • Confident Conversion Sales Academy
  • Outsourced Sales Manager and In-House Sales Trainings

If you are interested in our habit transformation resources, fill in the form below and we’ll let you know when we are running our next course.

I’m Interested in Habit Transformation

“When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves.”

~ Viktor E. Frankl

3 Keys to Commanding Your Success

I’ve been thinking a lot about success and ways to control it recently.

The events of the past six months, have shaken many people to the depths of their being and caused them to re-examine their values, dreams, goals, health and relationships – every aspect of their lives, really. Forces outside our control including the actions of governments tempt us to cede even more of our autonomy than is technically demanded which is where I turned to Viktor Frankl. As you may know, Frankl was a Jewish psychotherapist who was sent to a Nazi concentration camp – and, if you remember much from history, you’ll know that there wasn’t much left that you could control under those circumstances! I’m not comparing our situation to his, but it made me ask the question:

What if we accept the challenge to change ourselves before we are unable to change our situation?

As I’ve reflected on this and coached people through the past few months, I’ve seen very clearly that although success is not a one-dimensional affair – as people whose career or travel or relationship plans were disrupted realised – and although everyone has different definitions of success, there are KEYS to SUCCESS that every person can control.

#1 Building Helpful Habits

Did you know that there are scientific studies about the affect of habits on your outcomes in every area of life – including your health, fitness, grades, relationships, career and income prospects?

Some of their findings when it comes to bad habits are pretty scary, too!

I was reading one study that talked about a common habit that most people aren’t even aware they have, that causes their brain function to fluctuate by up to 40% over the course of an average work day and that is often linked to insomnia and other sleep issues. What this means, is that your unconscious habits are controlling and may be silently undermining your goals. If you don’t pay attention, by time you realise what is happening it may be too late.

You see, a few weeks ago, I was talking to one of my favourite clients on Zoom, and Martin told me about a focus habit that he had developed unconsciously that almost landed him on daily insulin injections. He was struggling to follow his doctor’s orders to avoid that terrible fate so we identified the habit that was tripping him up and set up an alternative pathway. The other day I talked to him again and his doctor was SHOCKED!!! to see his numbers in such good shape. Insulin is no longer in his immediate future, but he’s sticking to the new habit chain that got him off the hook.

The thing I love about focusing on habits is that once you get them set up they’ll carry you in the direction you want to go easily and effortlessly until you decide differently. Watching people implement my NLP-powered habit formation technique and seeing the changes they experience is always extremely exciting.

#2 Cementing a Positive Mindset

A person who truly understands the principle that “Energy flows where attention goes;” will focus on positive goals and outcomes and consider the tasks and milestones that will get them to their destination. That person won’t ignore the obstacles standing in their way, but will recognise their ability to figure out a path and surmount them.

You cannot ‘affirm your way to success’, you need to work your way there. If you focus on all the problems and things that might go wrong and might derail your progress, then the work you need to do becomes crushing. There is research on olympic athletes that documents their path from mere excellence to gold medal status based more on their attitude transformation than from any new training regimen.

Cultivating a positive, optimistic, outlook doesn’t remove problems from your path, but it means that you are hyper-focused on solving those problems and reaching your goals. Honestly, I’ve never heard of a pessimist who was also a success because ultimately pessimism saps your will to persevere and diverts your focus away from your goal.

#3 Deciding to Take Control

Ultimately, the choice is yours: You can either let other people control your life, attitude, and outcomes, or you can take control yourself.

Granted, there are things you can’t control, but the things that you can control are the gamechangers.

Here are 3 questions to help you make that decision, and take action to solidify your results:

What does success look like?
What do I need to do to create that success?
What obstacles are standing in my way?

If you feel like you’ve already ‘made it’, here’s a quick tip: studies suggest that people feel happier and more successful when they have a challenge to surmount, so set your sight higher and focus on the positive actions you will take to reach your new goal.

If all you can see is road blocks and obstacles, then it’s time for a positivity check: What is one positive thing you can focus on and one positive action you can take that will move you closer to your goal.

If you do this, I promise that you will feel more refreshed, motivated, and energised and ready to keep pursuing your goals.

NLP Mastery Academy

NLP Mastery Academy meets fortnightly (with a few exceptions over the holidays) to learn, review, and apply NLP techniques in your life. The personal interaction is a fantastic opportunity to explore how these techniques can be used in relationships, personal growth, career and work settings, parenting, and much, much more. If your interest in NLP is more focused on its power to create lasting change than on certification, then this may be the program for you. 

Click HERE to start your application process today!  

N.B. Because of the nature of this program, we have a rigorous screening process.

“Whenever the goal is to improve the quality of life, the flow theory can point the way… By stretching skills, by reaching toward higher challenges, such a person becomes an increasingly extraordinary individual.”

~ Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

Coping with Uninvited Change

When Anna’s boss told her that she wouldn’t be getting JobKeeper because in the face of circumstances he was closing the business she was devastated. How would she support herself now?

Like many business owners, Mark had done the math and decided that it simply wasn’t worth the risk of relying on government to sustain the business. He gave her some sound advice along with the bad news:

“Anna, you’re a fantastic worker and you have more potential than you’ve ever let yourself realise. I’m stepping back to re-evaluate my life and work and determine what I could learn to make my next venture shock proof. I think you should do the same. Take the time that your redundancy pay gives you to think and study before you search for the next opportunity.”

Anna listened.

She carefully calculated what she needed to live on, cut back some expenses to stretch out her window, and invested her time in her own learning. We did one session together to explore her talents, interests, and potential and then she immersed herself in learning and developing the skills we had identified.

Each week she set aside some money to invest in her development and certification, but she waited to spend it until she had clear direction based on her research.

Within six weeks she landed a role that is providing her with experience in her chosen field as well as growth opportunities. Her new employer said that he selected her because she had demonstrated her willingness to invest her own resources in developing in that area and that success leaves clues… In her case a willingness to challenge herself rather than wait for opportunity to arrive on a platter.

#1 The Habit of Investing in Yourself

“Success leaves clues.”

One of those clues is your personal investment in your own professional or skill development. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been in an industry, or whether you are a business owner or an employee, it’s easy to get absorbed in your daily work and forget to look outside your own business, industry, and current competency.

Developing the habit of setting aside time and money to invest in enhancing existing skills or developing new ones will ensure that you never become the ‘dinosaur in the office’ – the person who isn’t even aware of new trends, possibilities or technologies. You may not adopt them all, but you will have good reasons for your decisions and be able to explain the benefits of your choice.

When you have the mindset of growth and development, you will be prepared to meet new challenges and find new ways to add value.

#2 The Habit of Stretching Higher

Ordinary people coast along and rely on past achievements.

Extraordinary people reach for the stars.

Not only does an unending openness to ‘the next thing’ serve you well by keeping your idea bank fresh and full during stable times, it also prepares you to meet change and to act constructively in the face of challenge.

There are always more things to learn and do, new ways of meeting old challenges, and different avenues to explore. Developing the habit of growth will deliver you from mental and emotional boredom and sclerosis and help you maintain a youthful energy and enthusiasm.

#2 The Habit of Stretching Higher

In his famous book on Flow, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi talks about increasing the value of the time you invest in learning or acting by removing distractions and other sources of friction. He also reminds us that flow is a habit that we need to cultivate, one that improves with training.

Here are four essential disciplines that will enable you to define and develop new habits and make them last – even when your world is falling apart:

  1. Definition: you know what it’s like to start a new habit – you set out bubbling with enthusiasm and certain that this is going to transform your life then reality sets in and you wonder if it will make a difference after all. If you define the habit and your expected outcome in advance, and refer to this definition regularly it will bolster your motivation and action.
  2. Commitment: set yourself a minimum timeframe to practice the new habit (66 days is apparently ideal) and don’t let anything come between you and your habit during that time. At the end of the 66 days you may want to re-evaluate the benefits and measure your results against your definition.
  3. Chaining: In the book Atomic Habits, James Clear talks about the power of linking a new habit to an existing engrained one eg. Get out of bed -> go for a run; stand up -> drink water -> deep breathing. This sets you up for success because you are already doing step one, and step two will quickly become a logical successor.
  4. Linguistics: The language you use to describe your habits and your relationship with them matters a great deal. When you are constantly using words that reflect compulsion or necessity (should, must, have to, ought to), you are programming your unconscious mind to find these things distasteful and difficult.
    That’s why 1. Definition is such an important part of creating and maintaining productive habits. Your definition will help you focus on why you are implementing this habit, and the outcome you expect and create a positive attitude towards your new habit.

Transforming Your Habits, Transform Your Life!

That’s not actually an overstatement.

Making and executing decisions takes an enormous amount of energy, will power, and brain power so it makes sense to conserve that power for key decisions and not fritter it away on everyday matters. Your habits become the path of least resistance and take over when you are busy, tired, or stressed… Why not create habits that support your life goals, rather than ones that undermine them?

Habit development is such an important topic that it figures in many of my business development and sales programs as well as my coaching and NLP training. I also run habit transformation programs a couple of times each year.

If you’re interested in how to build constructive habits and eliminate ones that no longer serve you, use the link below to join my email list and you’ll be notified when my next Habit Transformation challenge is scheduled.

Join My Email List

“Today you have the chance to ask: What’s next? And to answer that in a way that creatively plays to your strengths. Of course, you can also stay in your comfort zone…

And pay the price of complacency.”

~ Chandell Labbozzetta

The Speed of Change

This has been an extraordinary year, but don’t let the drama of 2020 blind you to the radical changes that have been taking place all around us for several years and the possibilities they hold for the future.

A few months ago Peter Diamandis and Steven Kotler published their latest book, “The Future is Faster Than You Think” in which they talk about the converging technologies that are transforming our world at an unimaginable speed. The book is worth reading if you are feeling complacent about where you are today and what you have already achieved.

Here are a few interesting facts to reflect on when it comes to the future:

  • Almost all the companies profiled in the business school bible “In Search of Excellence” of the 1980s and 90s are no longer in existence.
  • Since 2000, 52% of the Fortune 500 have either gone bankrupt, been acquired, or ceased to exist.
  • Today, the world’s largest media company does not create any content; the world’s largest taxi company owns no cars; and the world’s most valuable retailer has no inventory.

If those facts don’t make you stop and wonder what’s possible for you, then they should.

Business, Career and Future Proofing in a World of Change

One of my Confident Conversion graduates has taken the idea of playing to her strengths and making her own rules to double her income in the past 6 months by focusing on the things she does well and delegating or dropping tasks she doesn’t enjoy.

Like Uber, Facebook, and Alibaba she stopped looking at what everyone else in her industry was doing and asked what was possible for her to accomplish and then shaped her own reality around those goals.

You may not want to be the ‘biggest’ anything and that’s fine… But if there’s one thing we’ve learned this year, it’s that addiction to comfort may be our biggest threat to survival so we need to rethink our approach to business and career and focus on:

  • Learning new skills,
  • Evaluating existing skills and modes of thought,
  • Searching for new technologies and opportunities that are revolutionising your industry.

Complacency is always dangerous. Now it’s a death sentence

Selling Yourself

If you were brutally honest with yourself, why would anyone (employer or client) hire you?

If you don’t have a persuasive answer for that question, then you have some work to do.

It’s increasingly clear that most people are far less interested in your qualifications than in your  network, motivation, experience, and skill-development potential. This is a completely appropriate response to the rapid pace of change.

The good news is that, in many fields, you can create opportunities for yourself through self-directed learning and by demonstrating your openness to new technologies and methodologies. A growth mindset (as described by Carol Dweck) is one of the biggest selling points because it demonstrates that you are open to evaluate (rather than mindlessly adopt) something new. When this is balanced by passion, proven diligence, deep thinking, and perseverance, then you become worthy of consideration.

So,…

Can YOU demonstrate those qualities?

And if not, what do you need to do and learn to be able to showcase your credibility so that you open doors to the future.

In my book, Confident Closing: Sales secrets that grew a business by 400% in six months and how they can work for you! I made the comment “We’re all in sales now whether we like it or not.” That sentence attracted a lot of negative feedback from people who think of sales as sleazy or pushy, but it’s really not a question of “Will you sell yourself?” But of “How will you sell yourself?”

Once you come to terms with that reality, you discover how important it is to work on your selling skills for the new era.

Making a Plan for the Next Stage

What is next for you both personally and professionally?

If you threw out all your existing blueprints, what would you love to do that would have value to others?

How could you do it in a way that was insanely profitable?

The end of the year is always a good time to re-evaluate your goals and dreams, and a disruptive year like we’ve just had is a particularly important time to do so.

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